Just the FIVE of us...

I really thought that 2010 was going to be a good year. And so far, I would have to say that it's the same bullshit as 2009. Somehow I always manage to dig myself a hole and fall in it. I'm always so relieved to claw my way back out, but it seems like as soon as I'm standing on flat ground, I jump right back in the hole. It's exhausting. I am so far behind in my classes that I just want to quit and be done with it. I haven't figured out, yet, if it's because I'm too lazy, or I just don't give a shit. Maybe they go hand-in-hand. I have 2 tests this week that I will probably fail like I failed the last one. Not because they are hard, but because I don't do the work required to know the material to do well on the test. I need to be working on a seminar with a group, and all the group members secretly hate me because I haven't come to any of the group meetings, and so far I have not contributed at all...although our project isn't even due until May. But I'm a terrible person for spending my time doing other things. They haven't said anything like this, but I know better.

Ok, so what was written above I wrote last night, never finished it, so it never got published. I'm feeling a little better today. I know I have so much that needs to be done, and I just need to quit whining, quit sitting on my ass, and get it done. I'm not getting many hours at work, yet, my house is a disaster area (hasn't been cleaned in weeks, and you know what this means when you have shed crazy dogs who track mud and dirt inside the house and have accidents, etc), and I am so far behind in my classes. I failed my last test, and I told myself that I was not going to do that again. I have a test Tuesday and one Thursday. The one Thursday is on like 5 or 6 weeks worth of class that I haven't even listened to. The one tomorrow is on Male genitalia and rectum and some other stuff, too, lol. Which reminds me that I actually had to watch a movie last night on how to do a penile and scrotal exam....and a rectal exam....on a live model. I totally saw his butthole which made me giggle, and then I felt a little better. Why can't I just get it together?? Can someone help me GET IT TOGETHER?!