You might be a nurse if...

1. You avoid unhealthy looking people in the mall for fear that they'll drop near you, and you'll have to do CPR on your day off.
2. It doesn't bother you to eat a candy bar with one hand while performing digital stimulation on your patient with the other.
3. You've had a patient with a nose ring, brow ring, and 12 earrings say "I'm afraid of shots."
4. You've ever bet on someone's blood alcohol level.
5. You plan your next meal while performing gastric lavage.
6. You believe every waiting room should have a Valium salt lick.
7. You have your weekends off planned a year in advance.
8. You have ever had a patient control his seizures when offered food.
9. You know it's a full moon without having to look at the sky.
   

Lots of stuff

I realize I haven't posted in forever. Oh well.

Some things that are going on:
School starts back on May 21. They are killing me. They make plans at the last second and ruin my already made work schedule, and my life. Damn them. You probably won't even know I exist over the summer because I am going to be that busy.

Do you remember sometime in March when I got my tetanus shot, and it went all crazy so I had to go to the emergency department to have it checked? Well, they actually tried to bill me $90 for it. $90 for some dude to look at my arm and poke it a few times in less than a minute and tell me to take some damn tylenol...wow. So I had to go through a lot, but now employee health (the place that gave me the shot) said that they are going to take care of the bill....GREAT!

The school is giving me almost $5000 loan that I never accepted for summer school. I only need like $1700 of that. I thought about just sending the rest of the money back so I don't have to pay for it later, BUT now I'm thinking about other uses for it. We need to get our holes in the kitchen and our almost hole in the bathroom fixed. I am also going to need a vacation at the end of this summer. I am trying to talk Russell into taking me to our cabin in the Smokey's for some love in the hot tub and Dixie Stampede among other things. We'll see.

Russell's sister is having to have surgery soon. They found a tumor on her ovary. :(

In other news, I told Russell I either want a baby or a dog...preferably a bulldog. He seems tot try to be ignoring me on this topic. We'll see how that goes also.

Fish tanks are still not even close to being ready. I am very angry about this and about ready to just throw in some fish anyway! Damn it. that big beautiful tank is going to waste.

I want to go out to eat today. I wonder if I can talk Russell into it. We may go see Shrek 3 tomorrow early. Maybe. We're also having a cookout/in tomorrow night. Russell is trying to make some gourmet burgers, but alas a couple of our guests do not like onions, so there goes one of his favorite ingredients. I also bought beer. We never have beer in this house mostly because we don't like it. I may try one.

And now I'm thinking even more of getting fish now. The only downside to that is I will have to change out large quantities of water every day instead of once a week. I do not like that. 29 gallons is a lot of water to be bucketing every day.

We watched Eragon last night. Good movie. Can't wait until the next one even though I really didn't want to watch the first one, lol.

Six Feet Under is the shit. We watch is together almost every night. :) We get it from Blockbuster total access which I highly recommend. We were getting netflix, but we can get twice the amount of movies for the same price. Good stuff.

Birthday is coming up. I am off work the whole weekend, but Russell has to work. The bitch wouldn't let him have it off. Well, too bad because I am making him not go! Bwahaha. lol Mom also wants to come up, but I have no idea what we're going to do, yet. Maybe go to Kennywood? Hmm. That is a thought. Or maybe good food somewhere. I did buy a new snazzy dress to wear somewhere, so maybe.

Russell is still sleeping. I need to clean. I cannot clean while he is sleeping. Well, maybe I can start on this far bathroom. Yes, that sounds like a plan. Buh-bye.

Watch it.

http://www.metacafe.com/watch/527593/the_lanlord/

Aquariums

Finally took some pictures of the new aquariums (minus fishies). These are all pictures without the flash, so that's why they look somewhat blurry. I had better pics, but somehow I lost them, and I am very angry now. The first one is my 29 gallon tank that is going to have goldfish in it, and the second one is Russell's 5 gallon tank that is going to have tetras in it. Yay.

YAY FOR FISH!

I am so excited right now! Russell bought me my 29 gallon fish tank. Huge, right? Well, I'm getting awesome goldfish to go in there, and I have been reading so much to become a goldfish pro and a good mommy. Those things, if taken care of properly, can grow to be HUGEMONGOUS!

So, not only am I excited about that, but Russell decided that he wanted to take the 5 gallon tank and put some pretty tetras in it! So, we're going to have 2 awesome fish tanks. I think we might put the smaller one in the bedroom. We have to have a heater for it, though, because tetras are tropical freshwater fish. They look so neat though.

The only sucky thing is that I have to cycle these tanks before we can even get the fish. I told you I was becoming a pro, lol. It will take about a month, but I need to run the tanks with ammonia in it to cycle it to where there is no ammonia, no nitrites, and just a little bit of nitrates. Look it up if you want to know more about what I'm talking about. As soon as I get stuff going, I will take some pictures.

I am also EXTREMELY EXCITED about something else. We both are. But I'm not going to tell you what it is, yet. You will just have to wait a while until things are fixed the way they are supposed to be. I don't want to jinx anything. No, not even you, Andrea. ;) You'll have to wait like everyone else. lol

Night of the living wasp

I hate wasps! I have this freakish phobia of them. I can't help it. The fear just takes over. I was in the living room sitting on the couch just now when all of the sudden a big wasp flies in my freaking face! I start screaming like someone is murdering me, and Russell comes running. He was a but pissed that I was screaming like that over a bee. It's not all bees I'm scared of...just of ones with stingers that can get you over and over again. I can kill those fat ones that eat your wood with the best of them. In fact, I hold the record in this household for most killed with a flyswatter. I will reign again this year! But I see a wasp, and I just lose it. I just read that the queen wasps are the only ones out right now (early spring) to make their nests and lay eggs, so I'm hoping that wasp will be the only one I see for a while. Now I'm scared as shit to go back in the living room, and Rusty won't go check the windows. :(

Why can't I be normal? Why can't there be no wasps? Why can't that stupid stove vent be sealed?!

My new used car and hot pink loveliness.

Went to NC this weekend. Looked at a bunch of junk and a bunch of ass (donkeys). We had a good time although I could have used more sleep. We both seemed to not get much of that away from our own bed. Gunther stayed with Grandma and had a good time. She keeps her windows open when it's warm, so of course he just loves that, and the fact that she cuddles him a lot.

I have a new used car. It's a 1999 red Subaru Sport. It has AC and a CD player....yay! It's also a standard which I never noticed that they made Subarus to where you had to shift them. It doesn't bother me, though. I prefer the stick, lol. Time to see if I can find someone to buy the ol' 1987 shit brown Pontiac. If you know anyone that might be interested, let me know. It will go for cheap. Haven't landed on a price, yet.

My new hot pink computer came. It was actually delivered yesterday while we were gone and has been sitting on the porch ever since. Good to know that FedEx leaves packages on a porch of a trailer in a trailer park...nice and safe, yup. We were surprised that it was still there. Not to mention it had IBuyPower.com printed really big on the side of the box. If anyone looked that up they would know it was a damn computer right there for the taking. Anyways, it is super cute and super fast, and I love it. I am typing on my new keyboard right now, actually.

Got the taxes done. We actually get $200 back instead of having to pay. We would have had to pay $400-$500 if we hadn't gotten deductions. Scary stuff.

I don't want to go back to school next week...or work. I am boycotting both.

Russell's mom has to have a procedure done this week, so keep her in your thoughts.

Dairy Queen has new waffle bowls. I highly recommend them.

I want a miniature pony or donkey one of these days. I also want a pot belly pig. I wonder if Gunther would try to eat it.

It's time to mow the lawn again. I must get a fuel primer.

I am going to have a garden this year. Russell's mom gave me the idea to open bags of potting soil, put it in the sun, and plant what I want in those. I'm really excited about this. Having fresh vegetables is great. That also reminds me that we need to go buy new flowers to line our walkway since the ones we planted last year won't be coming back. Our lillies should be starting to come up soon as well. Yay for spring!

Sunburn mostly gone. Bit of peeling in between the boobies now. Russell likes the tan boobies...lol.

Going to see Premonition today with my Rustybunches. I hope it's good.

Can't stand thinking about going back to work on Thursday. I will not let the assholes there get to me anymore than they already have.

My new hot pink computer has been ordered!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Cell phone battery has gone to crap. Apparently the warranty for that is only 6 months. Assholes.

Cannot wait until this semester is over.

I don't think I will be doing nice things for people anymore.
It's nice to be left alone all day feeling like a piece of shit.
This damn cat won't stop meowing.
I locked him in the bathroom because he wouldn't let us sleep, so now I have to listen to him still because I am up and right beside the bathroom I locked him in.
I can't wait until this semester is over.
I can't believe I have to do a whole freaking packet of drug calculations.
Spring break cannot come soon enough.
I have to work 3 12 hour shifts in a row before I can even have my break.
I don't want to work on 10 west anymore, but I don't want to start over either.
I need to clean the bathrooms because I haven't done so in a month or more.
I hate snow. Why do I get snow on my weekend off?

Catheter Queen

Andrea is bitching that people never post, so here I am. And I AM busy thank you very much, lol.

Today was my second day on the peds floor. I had a two month old baby. He was so damn cute! He got mad at me when I had to pull the catheter out of his weiner, but it was all good. My instructor has now lovingly titled me the catheter queen. I've had to put a catheter in and take on out all in one weeks time. I have never done either, and she said it's been a long time since they've gotten to do something like that on peds, so she swears that God is preparing me for some kind of catheter problem, lol.

I started tanning the other day. First day went well. Second day....burn city. And what's funny is that it didn't show up until way later, so I thought I was ok. What's even funnier is that I'm only burnt in places you can't see. My arms and face are fine. Everywhere else hurts like a mofo. Craptastic. It's itchy, too, but hurts when I scratch it...I cannot possibly win in this situation.

Yesterday was so nice that we took Gunther out to play in the grass. He is too funny. It's cute. I will take pictures sometime of him in his harness playing in the grass.

I am off work this weekend, and I am muy excited. I love my weekends off. It makes the ones that I have to work my ass off worth it.

Ugh.

I feel like crap. I'm tired all the time, and I don't want to be. I think it might be because I'm out of shape...big time. As soon as these stupid girl scout cookies are gone, it's go time. I mean it. I'm tired of being uncomfortable in my own skin. I'm tired of not wearing 3/4 of my clothes because my arms are uncovered, or I feel like they are too revealing or tight. Do you know how long it has been since I have worn a sleeveless shirt in public? Once almost two years ago when I lost a lot of weight, and that was still uncomfortable because I was used to not wearing them. I am almost 23 years old. I should not be having this problem, and I do not want to look back when I'm older and wish I would have been thinner to enjoy life more. And I know it's not true, but I worry that my own husband thinks I'm disgusting because of it. I hate that feeling. I want to look good for him and me.

Ugh.

I'm really stressed right now about taxes and cars and school schedules and work and house problems and computer problems and argh! This is my day off. I should be relaxing and enjoying it.

What a rip off

We took Russell's car to get an inspection sticker on it, so I decided to take mine and get an estimate on getting a new muffler since mine has fallen off sometime somewhere. Russell had to get new break pads just to pass, and sometime he'll need new roaters (or however you spell that). They somehow managed to take 90 minutes to put freaking break pads on so we got charged $90 JUST for labor. They really know how to rip you off. OH, and it's going to cost me $200 just for a new muffler. What a bunch of crap. I hate Morgantown. Who knows when I'll get my new computer now.

So, Russell and I went for a nice walk around the trailer park yesterday. It was so nice, and it didn't feel like exercise at all because we just talked the whole time. It felt good to go outside and do something. It was a nice day other than the wind.

My sea monkeys are HUGE now! I've only had them for two weeks, and they are humongous! Gunther wants to eat them really bad. I have not seen the sea monkeys doing nasty things, yet. I'm hoping to never catch them doing the dirty.

I cut Russell's hair today. It looks really good.

Wal-Mart rents carpet cleaners now for $30/day. We're going to get one this spring for our big spring clean. We're going to move everything out of our computer room and clean it real good because it gets major nasty, and we're going to move furniture and clean all the carpets again. I'll wipe down the walls and move everything around and clean real good. I'm excited to get this done because it needs it bad. Maybe it wouldn't if I did regular cleanings more often.

I slept around 16 hours total yesterday and last night. Not straight, but still. That is way too much, and I am sleeping my life away. Something has to be wrong with me. All I ever want to do is sleep. I think it was more of a boredom thing last night, but it needs to stop. Sleep is taking over my life.

I've also started a new series obsession....Six Feet Under. Kind of a weird show for me to get into since death and dead people freak me out. But I like it. Which reminds me...I saw Dawson's Creek on a tv at work the other day, and it made me very sad. Damn you Dawson Leery and your show!

I poke you with big needle.

I am so bored. I have to sit around for hours waiting for freaking class to start. So, I'll just tell you about my day.

I got to go to 2West again today. I put in 4 IVs. 2 went in perfectly, and the other two I got in with good blood return, but when I tried to advance the catheter, I hit a valve and blew the whole vein. It's okay, though, because it happens a lot, not something you can really avoid unless you can see the valve, and the nurse did the same thing twice after me, lol. Putting in IVs is addictive. :)
OH RUSSELL. lol

I would have went home a long time ago if I didn't need the points from class.

I got an A in medsurg clinicals. Yay. Now to move on to pediatrics.

We tried to order my new hot pink computer the other day, but now all of the sudden, shipping is no longer free, and we would have to pay an extra $65 for ground, so we're going to wait and see if we can get free shipping again. I hope they do it soon.

I can't wait fro spring. Russell and I are going to start walking together when it gets nice outside. We'll probably ride bikes, too. Andrea needs to hurry up and get her butt moved into the trailer because we're going to have tons of fun. She's going to bring up her bike to ride with us, too. Oh, and I'm going to have to set a time for spring cleaning. It needs it bad even though we just moved in April. Trailers get dirty easy. I'll probably try to do some over spring break. We'll probably go in to Braxton for some of it, too. We both actually are supposed to get off work. Yay!

Headlines: Chunky girl bites patient's finger to get to sandwich.

It's funny how I can get called chunky and fat 8 times and get kissed on the cheek twice BY THE SAME PATIENT all in one work day. I probably shouldn't let myself feel so bad since the same old man said to me "I love looking into your BLUE eyes". What's even nicer is the fact that after I put his glasses on him he says "I can see now. You look even fatter." This is also the same man that when I bathed him and asked him if he could wash his own privates or did he need me to, he said "I'm not shy. You can grab right on to that thing and get 'er done!" He was a big pervert and hit on everyone that walked into the room....in front of his wife. I think I even remember him telling me that if he had a sandwich in his hand then I would probably bite his finger off...

I may be chunky, but that doesn't mean that I want someone to tell me that repeatedly to my face. Russell said "what's that guys problem?" and I said, "I guess he's just being honest." He wasn't too happy about my answer.

Gee, I'm really looking forward to going back to work tomorrow.

I guess it's time to go eat dinner now like the fat girl I am.

Nothing's going to change destiny.

Not even my raspberry smirnoff is helping right now. I'm just so damn frustrated. Work is really pissing me off. The job is not bad...it's the coworkers. I am so tired of people acting so vicious. They're trully assholes. I'm not saying everyone is, but there are a good bit there that I could have burned at the stake.

School sucks for the most part. I did really enjoy the lecture today in pathophysiology. We talked about the cardivascular system with the patho part and patient care included. It was 3 hours long, and I actually listened the whole time. It was very interesting. Did you know that the reason why men have a better survival rate than women when it comes to heart attacks is because their heart produces extra "channels" to reroute blood flow if there is damage to a particular part. Women do not normally get these until after menopause because of the production of estrogen and birth control pills (which gives you more estrogen - mine even has extra estrogen in it *cries*). This seems very interesting to me.

Another reason why I am so frustrated is because I DON'T KNOW WHAT I WANT TO DO! I think I do and either something stands in my way, or I learn more about it and it no longer appeals as much. Wound care nursing sounds great, and I loooove gross stuff like that (stop making those faces), BUT I would have to pay for out of school classes and take a $400 certification exam every 5 years to make not much more than a regular RN. Yes, I am also in it for the money. I guess my plan is still to get my masters....we'll see if I can find something. It's enough to make you want to rip your hair out.

OH, and any bastard in this world would be damn lucky to have Ms. Andrea Ware! Any who think differently are just duckheads.

Maggot therapy

Lately I've been thinking a lot about specializing in wound care nursing. I have to do a presentation about something of my choosing for my clinicals, so I chose maggot debridement therapy. I'm going to paste my handout for your knowledge and enjoyment.

Maggot Debridement Therapy (MDT)

MDT is the medical use of live, sterile maggots for cleaning non-healing wounds. The use of maggots for this purpose has been noted for centuries even as far back as the Renaissance. Many military physicians used maggots during warfare. They found that soldiers who had their wounds colonized with maggots had a lower mortality rate than those who did not.

Medicinal maggots are approved by the Food and Drug Administration (FDA). They are considered the only living organism allowed for production and marketing. The FDA say they are to be used only "for debriding non-healing necrotic skin and soft tissue wounds, including pressure ulcers, venous stasis ulcers, neuropathic foot ulcers and non-healing traumatic or post surgical wounds.”

Medicinal maggots have three mechanisms of action: debride wounds by dissolving only necrotic, infected tissue; disinfect the wound by killing bacteria; stimulate wound healing. This leads to reduced wound odor, earlier healing, and less pain.

Debriding is a difficult task for physicians because they are not very precise in removing only the necrotic tissue and not healthy tissue. This can create a larger wound, more bleeding than is necessary, and the infection can spread leading to sepsis or amputation of the limb. Using a physician or other means of debriding the tissue creates a longer healing time, and it can be very expensive.

Maggots digest nutrients through extracorporeal digestion where they secrete a broad spectrum of proteolytic enzymes that liquefy necrotic tissue. The maggots then absorb the dead tissue. They start at a size of 1-2mm, and they normally grow to about 8-10mm during the digesting process.

Maggots also disinfect wounds through their antimicrobial secretions. These secretions include allantoin (found in many shaving gels that have a soothing effect on the skin.), urea (used for protein metabolism), phenylacetic acid (used in the production of Penicillin), phenylacetaldehyde(used in perfumes), calcium carbonate (used in teeth cleaning products), and proteolytic enzymes (break down protein into simpler compounds). The bacteria that are not killed by these secretions are ingested and lysed within the maggots. This includes antibiotic resistant forms of bacteria such as Methicillin-resistant Staphylococcus aureus (MRSA).

Maggots promote wound healing in a few different ways. The most obvious is micromassage of the wound by the maggots. This stimulates growth of granulation tissue. The maggot secretions appear to amplify growth healing of epidermal growth factor which is a polypeptide hormone that stimulates cell proliferation especially of epithelial cells by binding to receptor proteins on the cell surface. In addition, they stimulate growth of fibroblasts (gives rise to connective tissue), slow-growing chondrocytes (mature cartilage cells), and cartilage-specific type II collagen (strong, insoluble fibers serving as connective tissue between cells).

Preparation of Maggots

Putrid meat is hung outdoors to attract the wild flies. After eggs are laid in the meat, the meat is transferred to ventilated glass jars until they hatch (8-24 hours). The larvae are fed brewer’s yeast and ground meat for seven days after which they are placed in a jar with clean, warm sand to pupate. The correct species are sorted from the adults.

The flies are placed in a cage with honey, yeast, and water. Temperatures stay in the human comfort range. Gravid female flies begin laying eggs on cubes of meat about a week later. Seven hours afterward, the eggs are washed off the meat into containers. The eggs are disinfected with 10% bleach, and then they are transferred to sterile cultures with a medium of agar, dry meat, and dry yeast. This culture is placed in an incubator at 27 degrees Celsius for 24 hours. Representative maggots from each dish are tested for aerobic and anaerobic microbes. The sterile maggots are shipped in bottles packed in ice.

Application of Wound Dressings

The wound is irrigated with sterile saline, and then a dressing is placed on the border of the wound to protect the skin from the maggots’ enzymes. The maggots are placed on the wound and held in place with nylon mesh. The area is lightly covered in gauze padding and bandaged.

The dressing should be changed daily to check the maggots and the wound. The maggots, however, should be removed every 2-3 days with new maggots being placed depending on the state of the wound (all necrotic tissue should be removed). The maggots need oxygen to survive, so the dressing cannot be anaerobic.

Pictures of maggot therapy!

Warning: these pictures are not for people who are grossed out easily.

It's over :(

Dawson's Creek is now officially over, and like Sex and the City, I am officially depressed. Why can a show make me feel this way? I guess that's why they continue to make them. I wish the ending had a little more then what it did, but hey, that's life. Cheer me up because I will probably be like this for at least a week. Yes, I am a freak.

I am too depressed to write any more right now. I will update later.

"The Potato Incident"

I brought in a bag of potatoes one day from grocery shopping, and for some reason I layed them on the couch. Well, as you can guess with me, they sat there for at least a week. I went to put my coat on that was laying on the couch yesterday, and it smelled like rotten cat food, so of course I blamed it on Gunther, lol. It wasn't brought to my attention that it wasn't him until this morning when we got up to go to Russell's ultrasound appointment that I lifted that bag of potatoes to find a big rotten, gooey mess. It had been the potatoes all along. And the rottenness has taken itself into my couch cushions, and now I don't know what to do. :(

This really sucks.

By the way, just an extra note, now that I have discovered the joys of double roll toilet paper, I will never go back to the single roll. Why would you when you can change the roll less?